Would he be willing to take a pill that plays games with his testosterone?

My money’s on no.

It would ruin his libido he’d say. It would affect his fitness, his training, his body composition he’d say.

Testosterone is not something to be played with he’d say.

But oestrogen, progesterone, luteinizing hormone, FSH? Sure, why not?

Because the responsibility for contraception falls on the vagina owner.

And a girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do.

And she does.

Even if it means a mini kind of menopause. Even if it means having her cervix dilated and a foreign body inserted into her uterus. Even if it means cramps, and bloating, and weight gain, and literal mental health issues.

Would he allow a foreign body to be inserted into his penis?

I think not.

Even if it means she has to spend thousands on the pill each year?

Have you ever heard of a man offering to split the cost of contraception?

I haven’t.

And when she becomes the one percent failure rate, it’s she that goes through the trauma of a ruptured ectopic, or a termination, or god-forbid someone forces her to carry to term.

And then she and her friends debate the merits of telling him and they decide not to.

Because ‘it would just upset him’. And he ‘probably wouldn’t be able to handle it’.

And shame, his ignorance is his bliss.

So she carries the burden alone. And when her body is healed, and her heart almost, she reconsiders her options.

And none of them involve him.

Because a girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do.

While he has all the fun.